You’re A Feminist? : What Feminism REALLY Is

Hello everyone, it’s Wednesday! I rarely ever post in the middle of the week but I thought that this post needed to be written for the sake of my sanity and the stigma. Now, when you saw this title you either thought “ughh another feminist post, gosh” or “wooo hoooo yes” but no matter what comment category you placed your self in, I think this post would benefit you.

This topic came to me at a weird time in the day, about a month ago I was eating dinner with my family and I got a Pinterest notification that someone sent me a pin, the pin was a quote about feminism. I decided to share it to my mom and she loved it…my dad not so much. “I can’t believe my daughters a feminist” I automatically said I am and we got into a heated discussion about the topic. We were going back and forth, and he was going on and on but I realized something, what my father was describing as ‘feminism’ was different from my perception of feminism.

He said feminsim used to be for equality and but you already got it…it’s a battle between men and women, you are equal in the workplace, you get to vote yhada yhada yhada. That’s where I stopped him dead in his tracks (side note, we were yelling at each other at this point) I told him feminism to ME is no longer the battle between men and women, it is between women and women.

I told him if i wanted to try out for the football team, guys would be kind of weirded out and I would get called a few names but they would get over it in a couple of days. The girls on the other hand, would say “she just wants to be around the boys, what a whore” and “ughh is she lesbian or something”. The fight for feminism is to have all women support each other and to be proud of our contribution to society, and even though we are said to be equal to men, the stigma that we tried so hard to destroy is still just as alive as before.

Another reason that equality has not fully been achieved is that as society we keep the stigma alive, such as women being used as objects in pop culture, down to little insults on the play ground like “you run like a girl.” You know who’s fault that is…it’s are’s, it’s men, it’s women, it’s everyones.

Sure I am lucky to be able to got to school, but if I am so ashamed to use my voice because other WOMEN say it’s rude to yell. Ever since I was little

“Donatella, be quiet”       “Donatella, you can’t play soccer, your dress will get dirty”

“Donatella, sit still”          “Donatella, you can’t do that”

Feminism should not be an insult. Feminism is saying every women has a place in the world whether it’s in the army, the kitchen, the classroom, the courtroom, the front lines, the home. It doesn’t matter because we as women must come together. The sad part is that our ancestors fought to be looked at as a person, and we can’t seem to get over the fact that some girl wants to be on the football team.

To wrap everything up, feminism to everyone is different but next time you think about what it is to you, I hope what I said in this post comes to mind. Feminism is the fight for acceptance for women, by women.

I would love to hear your comments below and make sure to like and share this post, have a great rest of your week and I hope to see you too

~XOXO Donatella

Verbal Spam Mail

We all get those annoying messages in our inboxes telling us we won a car or a cruise, even though you don’t remember signing up for anything, the message is useless and a waste of time. Well verbal spam mail is similar, little do you know how many times you encounter it throughout the day. Lately, I have noticed all the pointless things people send via verbal communication, and it’s really not necessary. I wish people could filter out these rude and inappropriate comments, let me supply an example

The other day I was talking about how much I was fascinated with the Buddhist religion and how I wanted to learn more. Then this random person I was not talking to, decided that suddenly I cared about what they thought and they said “Oh my god, you don’t want to be catholic anymore”….like bitch, that is not what I said! and was I even addressing your presence in this particular situation. This a prime example of both verbal spam and pure stupidity, and teenagers question why adults don’t have respect for them…it’s because of the teens that think that they are the almighty God…or Buddha.

I wish I could just erase the comments that were said, as easy as dragging them to the junk or delete folder. But it’s not that simple, so I have taught myself to find the silver lining

  1. At least I am not that stupid
  2. I am lucky that I am aware of my place in the world
  3. I don’t annoy people like this

There are moments where I want to scream, slap them or just cry because I can’t handle the fact the people think that half the things they say are necessary. My sister has more knowledge and a better filter then you and she is 8.

The point of this post was to raise awareness for this verbal mail problem. So if you are a verbal spammer, please think before you  speak because I will appreciate it. To all the people who have been forwarded this verbal spam…I feel the pain, but there is nothing we can do about it. I hope you all enjoyed, sorry for the amount of paragraphing but I was feeling it today, make sure to visit my blog often, I post about 4-5 times a week!

~XOXO Donatella

*This my photo used, I would loved if you used it I just asked if you gave some credit by linking both my Instagram and blog. You can find the full picture on my Instagram, which i located in the handy dandy sidebar

The P.E.P.E

Today I just feel so sluggish and lazy, like someone sucked out all the motivation and all I want to do is marathon movies (preferably A Walk to Remember), on the couch, in my Snuggie. I call this feeling the “Post-Easter Pooped Effect,” P.E.P.E for short. I get this feeling every year and it lasts for a good 2 days, don’t get me wrong I love holidays but sometimes you get into the lazy mood because you haven’t had to “do” anything  for a while. The worst part is I have so much homework but I don’t want to do any of it, this is the problem with P.E.P.E, it slows you down from doing important stuff. When you think about it the easter season moods are like a graph, on Good Friday your mood starts to go up, then Saturday you mood is at 85%, but Easter Sunday roles around and your at 100% because the easter bunnies dropping off chocolate, but you drop to like 15% because it’s Monday and you mental work schedule  is all messed up.

The Easter struggles is a difficult on, and i’ll probably never conquer it, so let me know if you get like this in the comment section below. Sorry for the short post but P.E.P.E has made me lazy and uninspired. Hope you all had a great easter

~XOXO Donatella

Why I Hate Valentines Day!

Hello, today is the most dreaded holiday for you fellow single ladies, because every year our biggest insecurity is put on display for a whole 24 hours. Yes it is Valentines Day :(. Every year at the beginning of February we make plans with all of our single friends to spend a night together, but some how your still left alone at home watching the Notebook and eating chocolate. Well if this sounds familiar and you happen to be reading this post look no further for I understand the pain. In the spirt of Anti-Valentines day I decided to make a list of reasons I Hate Valentines Day

1. Hypocritical: We are told as women that we are supposed to be proud of being independent but this holiday practically screams “You Need A Man” and “A single women is a stupid women”, I swear my self-esteem take a major hit on February 14 and I feel my blood pressure rise every time I see a box of chocolates and it’s not because of the sweet treat.

2. Chocolate Craze: We all love chocolate, and chocolates on Valentines day is romantic, but not when your single. Your spending the night in and your eating this decadent treat(heart shaped of course) that your mom brought and snuggling up with a pillow that you wish was Channing Tatum , you realize that you can get your caffeine fix else where. Remember coffee tastes just as good and it wont remind you that your alone.

3. Chaperone Duty:  This Valentines day I am stuck looking after a couple and 5th wheeling it with a other single people, which is great, but the last thing I want to here is “awww you adorable” and “no you pick, no you pick, ok I’ll pick” Chaperone duty is definitely the worst part of Valentines day

4. So much for Singles Night: Just a couple hours ago I had the perfect plan. It was gonna be me and a really good friend hanging out tonight, watching chick flicks and trying to make our sorrows into laughter. But add a couple texts and 3 hours and turns out we are having a party with 1 other single person, 2 kids and the worst A COUPLE. Ugh the horror, I was quiet devastated to the point that I was considering faking my own death. Only Valentines day could bring such madness

5. Trying to Be Happy: How can I be excited or confident when it feels like the holiday is against me, I realize its a marketing business and it’s are fault we eat it up, but I still feel like the holiday is no longer based on the saint but on segregating society into Alone and Together.

I hope you all enjoyed my rant, and remember Valentines day is about loving people and everyone around you. If you spend Valentines day with friends, your hubby or Netflix just know that the holiday is not about finding love but it’s a commercial marketing tactic for businesses to make more money and expand their profit margins. Happy Valentines Day from yours truly

~XOXO Donatella